What The Fuck, "Nice Guys"?

abaldwin360:

deliciouskaek:

this is not a question from my inbox. please see below.

Brittany and I had a long conversation the other day pertaining to this type of thing.

That’s what it all basically comes down to is entitlement. 

Looking back at myself when I was in my teens, I can see where I thought I was entitled as a male to get pretty much anything I wanted as long as I worked hard for it.

It seems like our entire society is set up that way.

It took me until I was a lot older and wiser to see that this is exactly what was going on.

It also shows where women are almost considered a commodity in our society. 

That “getting the girl” is somehow a payoff for hard work or simply “being a good person”.

I can remember my 14/15 year old self wondering why my crush didn’t like me and seriously wondering what I had done wrong.

We are raised to believe that if you do “X, Y, and Z” then they payoff will be “A, B, and C”.

We are not taught growing up that a partner is more than a payoff, that (in my case) a woman is not a payoff. Look at how so many fairy tales and stories in popular culture involve a theme that the woman marries (or gets with) the hero that saves them.

This shit is pounded into our heads from the time we are tiny children and it took a lot of looking at things from different angles to figure it out.

The first thing these nice guys™ need to do is step back and realize that a woman isn’t a commodity, that a partner (or sex) isn’t a reward or payoff for whatever feat they feel they’ve accomplished.

It really is all about entitlement. 

from the blog of abaldwin360

Thank you, deliciouskaek for making a rebloggable version of this!

(Source: deliciouskaek, via misandradentata-deactivated2012)