So, if you don’t feel like reading the article (I don’t blame you), this is basically a guide to tearing down womens’ self-esteem so they want to date/sleep with you. This approach is called “negging” which is just another abusive behavior that’s been glamorized.
”To her guy friends, “So what’s special about this one.””
”“You know, your body language is all closed off. It makes you look like one of those newborns I saw on the discovery channel when they came out of the womb – all curled up.””
At this point, if you’re not seriously doubting this guy’s dating advice (I mean really, who takes advice from someone who thinks comparing someone to a newborn is suave??) he goes on to justify his use of negging. Apparently (according to this dudebro)
”Everyone wants to be liked. Everyone wants approval. No one wants to be ignored. The same holds true for beautiful women – even more so. Their whole reality is based on having power and having acceptance and adoration through their good looks. Take that away and their whole reality crumbles and they’ll do anything to get it back.”
There are so many things wrong with this.
1: Just because you find her attractive doesn’t mean that she’s shallow and her entire world revolves around her looks.
2: Sometimes, yes, people do want to be ignored. If you’re walking up to strangers and insulting them, there’s a good chance that they would prefer you ignored them.
3: The fact that you think it’s acceptable to destroy someone’s self-esteem to the point that they’ll “do anything to get it back” is disgusting and terrifying.
“ Negging women is ideal for really hot girls – 8s, 9s, and 10s. For an average girl (6s, 7s), you don’t want to use value zingers. All you need to do is demonstrate social value – you don’t need to lower hers. Hers wasn’t that high to begin with.”
RUDE. Like women are so obviously numbers on a scale. Look buddy, just because you think someone is a “6” (whatever that entails) doesn’t mean someone else doesn’t see her as a “10”. Also, you have absolutely no way of knowing her self-esteem and ”social value” and trying to lower anyone’s is gross.
Then, he tried to justify himself to the women who were (understandably) upset.
”So please girls, if a guy told you that you had lint in your hair and that would “cut you down” or would “crush you”, and your ego is THAT fragile, then don’t go to night clubs!! After all, the guys have to deal with MUCH WORSE from you girls!”
Or, (and this is a little out there, stay with me) you could try NOT hitting on women who are clearly just there to have fun with their friends and don’t want to talk to you! And if you have feelings that can be hurt by random insults, don’t go to clubs! Or bars! Or anywhere fun really, because this author seems to think that going out and having fun = open invitation for harassment.
“So if you’re a normal-looking girl with a normal attitude, you probably will NEVER BE NEGGED in your life. So for crying-out-loud, don’t worry about it.”
Oh good, now he’s implying harassment is a compliment. It just keeps getting better and better.
And then, we get to the source of all of his hatred of women:
”Negs are for those glamour girls that have been spoiled all their lives by Daddy and have little sense of reality (like Kim Kardashian or Paris Hilton for example). These are the types of girls that enjoy shooting “nice guys” down. It’s THAT kind of girl that negs are designed to attract.”
Oh. Now it makes sense. He thinks that he can clearly tell, just by glancing at someone, their entire sense of reality, their self-esteem, their childhood AND their source of income. Gee, that’s not presumptuous at all. And he also seems to think that, when he’s been turned down by a girl, it’s not because he was being rude, or she didn’t want to be hit on, or she just wasn’t interested, or anything reasonable. No, he thinks it’s because he was just too nice.
The TL;DR? Yet another Nice Guy™ thinks women owe him something. Hooray.